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Neal’z Rulz

By Neal Johns

It is not beyond the bounds of possibility that you might go on a 4-wheel wheel drive backcountry trip with me, so here are some survival hints. Stories abound about my strange personal habits and idiosyncratic, curmudgeonliness behavior. Ignore me, so here are some survival hints. Stories abound about my strange personal habits and idiosyncratic, curmudgeonliness behavior. Ignore them as they have softened with time. The truth is much worse.

Rule # 1

There should be no music played loud enough for me to hear. Music, either classical, rock or rap, softens the soul and is not the proper ambiance for a Real Man. The natural sounds of animals tearing each other apart, thunderstorms or earthquakes is the proper ear food for a Real Man’s soul.

Rule # 2

The Leader gets his choice of any females in the group. This rule, which served me well for many years, has been retired for a couple of decades or so, but who knows, Marian is getting up in years so it

may be reinstated someday. On second thought, I’m getting up there too, so forget Rule # 2

Rule # 3

10% loss is allowed, people or vehicles. A word to the wise: Don’t get on my bad side. (Examples: disagreeing with me, pointing out an obviously untrue statement, giving me funny looks, etc.).

Rule # 4

No mention of any kind, in any context, of the word hair‚ is allowed. The reason for this rule is obvious upon inspection of said Leader.

Rule # 5

In the event of observing the Leader talking to any new, strange female on the trip, no one shall interrupt with a mention of Marian, my current wife. (Example: How’s Marian? Oh, my maiden sister is just fine, thank you.)


Rule # 6

Never suggest, in public, that you suspect your Leader is lost. If certain of your ground, (pun!) you may mention discretely and privately, that you suspect he is Geography Challenged.

See Rule 3.

In Memory of

  • Tom White 
  • Gene Olsen
  • Walt Wheelock
  • Tom Church
  • Bill Ott - passed July 10, 2004
  • Bill "Shortfuse" Mann -Passed August 2006
  • Dwight Stroud - passed January 19, 2007
  • Lorene Crawford - Passed August 2009
  • Alan Romspert - Passed August 19, 2009
  • Don Putnam - November 5, 1916 to August 14, 2012
  • Jim Proffitt - March 21, 1941 to September 1, 2012
  • Reda Anderson - passed October 25, 2012
  • Rick Cords - May 1944 to February 1, 2014
  • "Sir" Bob Rodemeyer - December 1950 to November 11, 2014
  • John Fulton - July 5, 1937 to February 15, 2015
  • Marilyn Martin - November 19, 1929 -  June 20, 2015
  • John Page - passed September 8, 2015
  • Gary Preston - passed February 24, 2016
  • Ted Kalil - recently passed
  • Jerry Etchison - passed in December 2016

" Happy Trails To You, Until We Meet Again..."

Coming Up

Sat Aug 26 @12:00AM
San Bernardino Mtns
Sat Sep 09 @11:00AM - 01:00PM
DE Meeting
Sat Dec 16 @12:00AM
DE Christmas Party


March 2017

  • Ken Hemkin of Fountain Valley, CA

April 2017

  • Mikkel Hansen of Lake Forest, CA
  • Jeff & Kathy Evans of Kernville, CA
  • Gary & Kathy Bowen of Bakersfield, CA
  • Richard Kenney of Simi Valley CA
  • Matt Jones

May 2017

  • Lindsay Woods of Hesperia CA
  • Stephen & Jennifer Mersman of Pinion Hills, CA